Sunday, September 9, 2012

yes yes, I'm in love

It was early September 2006 in DA-IICT, on a sunny evening, I was returning back to my room after buying a packet of Balaji potato chips from daddu shop, this time cautious not to starve late night like the previous day. I saw my friends Sai Teja ( aka zIzO ) and Tilak ( aka swamiji ) going to computer lab. I thought, zIzO going to lab building : yes, its quite possible even during an earth quake, but swamiji too ? and so joined them. We entered lab #008 and one of the final year seniors Kanishk Kunal was already there. That was when he introduced her to us, my life changing moment. She was very beautiful and attracted me the most. zIzO saw her first and after sometime I saw her very closely. We were asked to leave the lab in just 10mins but I couldn't get her out of my mind on our way back to hostel. The way she showed herself, her quick movements, whispering, giving lot of room to make me comfortable, simply awesome. May be thats called love at first sight. I met her again in the lab that night, this time alone. She was very friendly and I became comfortable with her in no time and we spent a lot of time together. I knew that I need to improve myself a lot, dedicate a lot of time to her, be more disciplined to impress her more. What I didn't realize then was, all that is easy to do and one need not have any experience to love.

Many times I spent more than an hour with her and at the end she just says I'm wrong or she didn't have enough time to understand me well. I assumed that she didn't like me, I'm not her type and I was afraid of losing her. I then came across a few friends online, who have been in love and learnt a lot from their experience and that gave me another good chance to spend some eventful time with her, without any challenges. This continued for about 2 years, during which I had to wake up early in the morning to meet her sometimes, had to jump over college walls and meet her secretly in friend's rooms. Only from my 3rd year in college, I was able to meet her in my room, just me and her, not worried about the lab closing time any more, no need to convince friends to give us some more private time in their rooms. One more year passed, but I was not able to take our relationship to next level, it was still like a green tomato, not developed fully yet.

I finished my undergrad (ug) in 2009 and thanks to Shalin, I joined as intern that summer in AOL, Bangalore. I had none of my ug friends around and also thought I may lose my first love forever. I had applied to IIIT-H Masters (MS) program, which I heard was a good place to be in close touch with my first love. Also may be I can find a new love and propose, though I realized later that one need not propose to love and simply start loving. Things happened as expected and I joined IIIT-H. It was perfect for me, more because it didn't show unnecessary caring for me and I had total freedom to be what I want. The only problem was (is?) I had absolutely no idea what I want to do. All I had in mind was my first love and I wanted to some how Take Care of it. During the first year there, I met a few like-minded lovers and realized what I should do to take my love further ahead. All these years I was just fascinated by this love and thought I was drowned in it, while the truth was, I was standing before this sea of love and it was just touching my feet. There are some moments during which you realize the truth unconsciously and that changes your confidence, approach and take you further ahead with a lot of ease. May be the trick in life is to change consciously, which is very hard for me to practice at this stage. All I can relate now is, I seem to have gone through this process early in my second year of MS and it was so much fun after that. I don't remember if I had worked hard to feel my love after that, as any level of effort feels normal now. All I care about now is the time I spend to love and nothing else.


ok.. that's the end of story. If you knew me, with easy hints in between, you would have got what my first love was. Yes, its TopCoder :) or in general, programming contests. I'm on a break with it now and will catch up soon. Some of my juniors keep asking me questions on how to prepare, where to read etc. I'm no expert in giving clear answers to that. You may refer to Rudy's interview in this blog for some good answers. I can as well give some non-technical advice, but I thought, let me just recollect my journey and enjoy writing (this is my blog!). May be you want to read some parts of this post again now. If you still want advice, may be keep roaming in your hostel with a packet of chips ;) , who knows, that may be the life changer for you too !

So next time if someone asks you, 'hey, are you in love?', remember the good things you enjoy a lot doing and proudly say yes yes, I'm in love


  1. Very good post man :) . Start writing something about software design after you complete your Bootcamp @ fb.

  2. When I read first paragraph I thought ending is gonna be something like that and tada ..

  3. Wonderful wonderful post ! :) :) Beautiful :)

  4. Some of my friends asked me to relate some parts of the post. Instead of editing the post, I will mention a few of them here.

    Meet her in friends rooms, jump over college walls <---> I got my brother's old computer only in 3rd year, and TopCoder was blocked in DA-IICT, so had a hard time bypassing firewalls and competing in ultra slow environment. This is the only thing I hate DA-IICT for !!

    Green tomato <---> A tomato turns red from green, you know this if you are a topcoder :)

    realized I was just standing before sea <---> If you know about Segment Trees, BIT, Matching etc., these are so basic and even B.Tech 2nd year students know them now. I learnt all this for the first time during Masters 1st year (I wonder how I reached yellow in TC without knowing all this!). Just lucky to make a good decision of joining IIIT-H and not go with routine jobs early.

  5. Nicely written and thanks for mentioning me. Good to see that you have so much passion and love for what you do. :)